Reflect

Think about your communication style and the interaction you have with people.

Write 

Mental health experts generally find it is better to have others disagree with you than ignore you. Do you agree? Recall specific examples from personal experience to illustrate your point.

Basically in your own perspective

 

Well i want to ask you if , Have you ever been around people who say whatever they think without any consideration for the appropriateness of their remarks? Perhaps you finally decided to approach them about their lack of tact, but received the response: "That's just the way I am. People need to get used to me."

Contrary to what most people think, communication style is not exclusively determined by personality. It is also affected by the choices we have learned to make by watching others, trial and error attempts, parental influence and a variety of life experiences. Communication style is a choice. For example, we choose words, how loudly we speak, timing of the conversation and the strategies we use to influence others. These choices affect whether or not people hear our point or are distracted by our behavior. When we make the wrong communication choices, people have two thoughts:

1. "Why is this person acting this way?"
2. "Why is this person treating me this way?"

If our improper communication style becomes the listener's focus, the point we are trying to make is ignored.

Mental health experts generally believe it is better to have others disagree with you than

ignore you. Express your opinion on this matter, using specific examples from personal

experiences to support your position. Next, discuss whether (and how) it is possible to

disagree without being disconfirming.

a. I agree with this, being ignored by parents or close friends and family is said to be one of the most damaging things that can affect children growing up. This offers no acknowledgment, no support, no reasons for the treatment, and really no feedback whatsoever. This leaves children confused and unsure of themselves, typically resulting in shutting themselves off from people. I never experienced this as a child, but I have experienced disagreements many times as I am a pretty opinionated person. Experiencing a disagreement with someone, even though it Can be unpleasant or lead to defensiveness and aggression, is better than being ignored because at least their position is being explained and you can attempt to

empathize and acknowledge their perspective. There was this guy I liked a lot, so much that I wanted my parents to meet him and get to know him, but after about a year of getting closer he suddenly dropped off and became distant. It was unclear to me why, so my own imagination convinced myself I was not good enough, or

he saw something he didn't like in me. The silence was infuriating, but when we

inally ran into each other later we got to talking and he explained he was leaving

for Thailand and couldn't get attached. Even if the reason was lame and I didn't

agree with how he went about it, at least I knew where his mindset was coming

from instead of jumping to self-put-down conclusions about myself to try to

figure out the reason behind the silence. Another time I experienced being

ignored, was one night me and my roommates and neighbors were all outside on our patio smoking cigarettes and drinking late at night, and the conversation turned to religion, which is of course a touchy subject, but as I began explaining

my stance I noticed everyone was tuned in except for my roommate Mary. She

was scrolling on her phone, completely ignoring me talk. I thought maybe she just

didn't care about what I had to say, and that annoyed me because when someone

has opinions on religion or big things like that, it is a poignant characteristic about

themselves that they have likely given a lot of thought, so to ignore them and not

even listen was so rude. At least times before, when we would get on touchy

subjects she would voice her opinion and even if we disagreed on fundamental

things, by expressing them, we could find common ground to agree on and

examples of each other's perspective to analyze. Disconfirming messages like

being ignored is damaging because the receiver has nothing to work with, and

therefore cannot even begin to figure out how to fix the problem if there is one, if

it isn't being discussed. It demonstrates a lack of concern for our needs and ideas,

which is worse to our egos than someone simply having different ones. We can

constructively disagree with someone, and clearly explain our stances and listen

to theirs, and express evidently how we feel about that difference in our opinions.

Some disagreements can of course lead to anger, but even anger would tell us

how that person feels and we would get to know that person better through that

experience. Listening attentively would communicate care about them, and

explaining our stances respectfully would get our ideas across more clearly.